ISN'T IT ROMANTIC

©1992 by John Robinson Wheeler. All rights reserved.

"ISN'T IT ROMANTIC" INT. PARTY ROOM - SPALDING MANSION - EVENING The furniture has been moved about to accommodate the 40 or 50 guests,and to provide them with snacks and entertainment. A pianist plays at agrand piano, though we might also hear light orchestral music. The partyleaks out through some glass doors out onto the patio, where a few peoplegaze at the moon, chat, or dance slowly. Everyone is dressed slightly lessformally than is MAX (black tie). MR. SPALDING and MRS. SPALDING are mingling,but Victoria is nowhere to be seen. Max stands in the doorway, scanningthe crowd for her. The SPALDINGs spot him and excuse themselves to go togreet him.           MR. SPALDING Max, how are you, glad you could come. My my, you'll make us all feel underdressed, I'm afraid.           MAX What, this old thing? I just threw it on.           MRS. SPALDING Well, I think you look quite handsome.           MAX Thank you.           MRS. SPALDING And you've brought a present for Victoria, how sweet.           MAX Yes, I wanted to give it to her, but I don't see her around.           MR. SPALDING She's probably gone off somewhere with that crowd again.           MAX That crowd? You mean her 'other' friends?           MRS. SPALDING Yes, we promised Victoria she could have a party with her friends earlier.           MR. SPALDING Barely managed to shoo them out of her before the guests arrived tonight.           MAX Maybe you should have kept this function separate from her birthday party.           MRS. SPALDING Oh, but everyone wanted to help wish her a happy birthday.           MAX They won't be able to do that if she's not here.           MRS. SPALDING She promised to make an appearance.           MR. SPALDING I hope she'll put on something decent for once.           MRS. SPALDING Benjamin!           MR. SPALDING Damned lot. Dress like neanderthals. Might as well be from the zoo.           MRS. SPALDING Neanderthals don't live in zoos, dear.           MAX Yes, and animals in the zoo don't wear any clothing at all.           MR. SPALDING Perish the thought! They're bad enough with their clothes on . He shivers and takes a swig from his drink.           MAX So where did she meet these friends of hers?           MRS. SPALDING At college. She lived with them in a co-op.           MR. SPALDING For four years.           MAX What college was it?           MR. SPALDING Michigan. You know, she could have gone to Bryn Mawr. She should have.           MRS. SPALDING We sent her to a private high school.           MR. SPALDING The finest money could buy!           MRS. SPALDING She was first in her class.           MR. SPALDING Valedictorian!           MAX Oh, was she?           MRS. SPALDING Oh yes. And wonderful SAT scores!           MR. SPALDING 1360!           MAX So why did she go to Michigan?           MR. SPALDING That's what I want to know!           MRS. SPALDING It was her backup school.           MAX She didn't get in to Bryn Mawr?           MR. SPALDING Of course she got in. She got in everywhere. You want to know why she went to Michigan? Because we told her not to go there.           MAX Well, it was her choice.           MR. SPALDING That was no choice. That was a protest vote. Michigan. Hmph!           MRS. SPALDING She did graduate with honors.           MAX There you go. An education is an education.           MR. SPALDING Yes, but I'd already told all my friends that I was sending my daughter to Bryn Mawr! Now what do I tell them? None of their kids go to Michigan! And what does she do now? Nothing! She refuses to get a job because she says that will be selling out to "the system." Is that what she learned at Michigan? Is that what my hard-earned money paid for?           MRS. SPALDING Quiet, Ben. People are hearing you. He mops his brow and polishes off his drink. Max fidgets, glancingat his watch.           MR. SPALDING I'm sorry. Sometimes I get upset thinking about it.           MAX Well, look, if you think she might show up soon, I'll stay around. Otherwise I might have to leave.           MRS. SPALDING Oh, do stay. I'm sure she'll show.           MAX Perhaps I could see if she's in her room?           MR. SPALDING Oh I wouldn't advise that. She never lets anyone in her room.           VICTORIA (O.S.) Hello everyone. Everyone turns their heads to see Victoria. She stands glowing inthe center of the room in an elegant, shimmering evening dress, suddenlyproud, beautiful, and radiant -- Pygmalion transformed for the society ball,everything her father would want her to be. She wears an odd smile on herface -- satisfaction at putting on the proper image for the company, yetshe knows it's not for them, it's for Max, and she hopes he gets the message.They gaze into each other's eyes momentarily and Max grins in awe.           MAX Hello Victoria.           MR. SPALDING Good heavens Victoria, you look beautiful.           MRS. SPALDING You decided to wear the new dress. Oh you look just heavenly, Victoria.           MAX Your mother has found just the word I was looking for. Happy birthday. With amazing style, Max bows and kisses her hand lightly. She smilesregally and curtsies slightly.           VICTORIA Thank you. Max pulls himself up closer and speaks quietly to her.           MAX What was that you said about surface appearances revealing who you are? Victoria raises an eyebrow and smiles. Max lets go of her hand andturns to stand more at her side, facing her parents. By now her father hasmanaged to shush the crowd somewhat and gathered most people's attention.Standing under the light, Max in his tuxedo and Victoria in her dress, bothof the overdressed for the party, the two stand out like the King and Queenof the ball.           MR. SPALDING Quiet, everyone quiet. I'd like everyone to meet my daughter, Victoria, and to wish her the very happiest of birthdays today.           EVERYONE Happy birthday Victoria! Congratulations! etc... Thomas enters holding a birthday cake atop which burn 21 candles.The crowd sings "Happy Birthday." Victoria blushes and nods andsmiles. She seems genuinely to be enjoying the moment though she probablywouldn't admit it later to her friends. The cake is placed on a countertopin front of Victoria. As the song ends, she takes a huge breath and blowsthem all out. The crowd whoops in congratulations.           MAX Did you make a wish?           VICTORIA Yes.       (she stares up at him) Did you?           MAX Yes, I did. She's a bit surprised at his response to her playful remark. Theycatch each other in another gaze, broken when someone hands her a knifeto start carving up the cake.           VICTORIA Okay, who wants a big piece? There's a lot of hubbub and noise through the crowd again. The pianistmakes a flourish on the keys and begins playing again, which attracts someattention. As Victoria starts cutting the cake, we hear a shout from thecrowd.           VOICE Sing us a song, Victoria!           MRS. SPALDING Oh! You haven't done that in years.           CROWD Yes, a song, a song! Victoria suddenly turns very shy and starts trying to come up withpolite excuses. Thomas takes over cutting the cake. Max turns to her withan inquisitive look. The crowd gets more insistent.           MAX A song?           VICTORIA It's something I used to do when I was a little girl at Daddy's parties. But I don't do it any more.           MR. SPALDING Do please sing, Victoria.           MAX Go on.           VICTORIA       (to Max) Do you really want me to?           CROWD Yes, yes, sing! etc...           MAX Yes, I would.           VICTORIA Well... okay, I'll try.           CROWD Hooray! Victoria moves across the room to the piano and exchanges some wordswith the pianist, who nods. Victoria looks to Max for some courage, andhe smiles warmly from the back of the crowd, who have all moved forwardpast him.           MRS. SPALDING What are you going to sing for us, Victoria?           VICTORIA I was just asking myself the same question. The crowd laughs. She continues to turn her head to the pianist toconfirm things.           VICTORIA Uhm, let's see. Something a little special I think.       (as she prepares       herself) Ahem. Remember, I haven't done this in a while. No rotten vegetables, please. The pianist does a roll on the keys and waits for her cue. She hasher eyes closed a moment, then slowly opens them as she starts to sing "Isn'tIt Romantic," slowly and expressively. She gazes past the crowd huddledaround her and directly at Max, who halfway through begins to fidget withthe present he's holding, but soon forgets about it and by the end has completelyfallen in love with Victoria. The song ends, and the crowd swarms aroundher, congratulating her and hugging her, but she keeps her eyes on Max,who stands at the very back of the room. He toasts her with a piece of hercake, and she smiles and nods a thank-you. DISSOLVE TO: